Rumbo

I've taken to listening to the BBC at night as I drift off. I find the sportscasts highly soporific. Just say the word "cricket" and I drop off.

The problem is that sometimes they follow the sportscast with something interesting and I snap awake.

The other night, for instance, I was all but asleep when I heard that Donald Rumsfeld had gone to Vietnam. It was just a recap of the day's top stories, so I didn't hear why Donald Rumsfeld had gone to Vietnam, and I lay there puzzling it out instead of sleeping.

My first thought was that he'd succumbed to dementia and forgotten what war he was fighting.

Then it came to me -- he'd gone back to finish things up, Rambo-style. (If I had photoshop, I would cleverly blend these two photos together, creating a "Rumbo" figure. Sadly, I do not have photoshop and I know the limits of Paintbox too well to attempt anything so advanced, so I've opted to simply give you the two photos. If you cross your eyes a bit while looking at them, they'll sort of blend. The only other option was a pic of Rummy as the main character in the Matrix, which was cool, but which really has nothing to do with this post.)

What brilliance! How better to distract attention from Iraq than to go refight Vietnam? Singlehandedly no less!

Having sorted this all out to my satisfaction, I went to sleep, only to find out the next day I had it all WRONG.

Rumsfeld went to Vietnam to "increase military contacts," not to draw first blood (part II). As far as I can tell (and I admit, I've only skimmed the press coverage) he didn't kill anyone, or rescue anyone, or fire a single exploding arrow.

On the other hand, the cricket scores I heard WERE correct, so pip pip and all that.