Love My ButtI spent my 11th summer consuming Barbara Cartland historical romances by the pound. I must have read upwards of 200 of them and could quote whole passages at the drop of a poke bonnet ("Syringea's eyes seemed far too big for her tiny, heart-shaped face.") In the end, I could have written my own. In fact, I did, which brings me to today's bone of contention.
At left is a romance novel written by a woman with whom I WENT TO UNIVERSITY. At the time, she showed no signs of becoming a budding Barbara. Apparently, she didn't even consider becoming a romance novelist until she'd completed a degree in English Lit and abandoned a career as an accountant.
She certainly didn't write the masterful Deranged Duchess at the age of 11, LIKE SOMEONE ELSE I COULD MENTION. And while I'm sure The Marshall and Mrs. O'Malley is a fine book and a credit to the genre, I find it hard to believe it could be better than Love and Pumpernickel, the rags to riches story of a poor girl pig farmer (which I believe still exists in manuscript form in my Aunt Margaret's woodshed. I must look into it...)
2 comments:
well, mary, i had a look in your aunt margaret's woodshed (please don't tell her, i wouldn't want it to jeopardize our new friendship, which i'm hoping may turn into something 'more'). i didn't find 'love and pumpernickel', but i did find a number of other items. i know you probably don't want me to go through this in such a public forum, but i feel i owe it to your other readers. so, here's what i found:
1. your bobby orr collage
2. your roger moore collage
3. your brother archie's right earlobe, in a pickle jar
4. your loverboy cassette tapes
5. your sweet valley high (canada) book collection
6. your unsent love letters to loverboy, bobby orr, roger moore, moose dupont and bob newhart
there was more, but i wouldn't want to embarrass you.
MY BOBBY ORR COLLAGE?! i've been wondering what happened to that for YEARS!
margaret is clearly the keeper of the mary campbell library.
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